Punching Bags & Paychecks

7 May

Today I had to endure my third trip going to court with Green and listen to the judge admonish me about my lack of self control while he backhandedly congratulated me on finishing 37 of my 52 weeks of anger management classes. This is all because I slapped Green last year, two months before our 2nd Dday, when I suspected that he had not ended his affair as he had told me he had.  It was not a hard blow but my nails were broken and I drew blood.  Three little drops of blood.  So Green called the cops like a punk.  And me like a dumb ass, I admitted it ALL to the sheriff.  Why not? I was not ashamed.  In fact, I was proud.

punch me punch you“Hell yeah I slapped him! He’s a lying cheating pig!”  I mouthed off as my handcuffs were slapped on.

“Well he still has rights to be in your home until you are divorced,” said Sheriff Tight Shirt, “And you can’t strike him. Unless you say you were defending yourself.”

“Oh no sir. He lost all rights when he put his penis into a filthy whore,” I said proudly as he took me to the sheriff cruiser.  I was led past Green who was dramatically nursing the droplets of blood on his cheek.  He’s had worse cuts from shaving but on that day he could’ve earned an Oscar for his dramatic acting. 

“I hope you are proud of yourself SLUT,” I spat at him as I walked by, “I am the mother of your children and you are putting me in jail?  Where is the jail for whores? You and your whore belong in WHORE JAIL.  You should have taken that slap like a man.  But you’re not a man.  You’re a bitch.”

Me and my big mouth.  Sitting in the back of that cruiser I had such a moment of clarity. WTF is going on with you?! I thought to myself, Damn Flaca – You have f’g lost it. 

Talk about triggers.  The courthouse. The stupid bailiff!  I CANT STAND the smug mustachioed bailiff.  But I hate the short red-headed Deputy District Attorney even more.  (Red heads I love you but this DDA is a jerk! Sorry!)  Today DDA Red Head tried to be nice to me but I ignored him and pretended to not hear him speak to me.

Green sat in the back of the courtroom head down seemingly praying that it would all be over very soon.  Jerk.  Like in all things from this affair Green gets off scott free.  Green is not the one with the conviction (it was plead down to a misdemeanor but still! I haven’t had a traffic ticket in over 15 years and I had never been arrested. NEVER.) and Green’s not the one with a restraining order against him.  Yes.  You read that correctly.  The court issued a restraining order against me.  For two years, with one year done and one year left to go.  It’s intent is to keep me from ‘harassing him’ or being less than ‘peaceful’ around him.  He didn’t ask for it. It was required with my probation.  Hah!  The absolute absurdity of the situation would be hilarious if it was not all too real.

I told Green where is the restraining order for your STUPID PENIS?! Where is the restraining order for your hypocritical lying face?!  Where is the restraining order against evil manipulative whores like Maria?  He says nothing.  We have already asked for the restraining order to be lifted but the judge won’t budge. I don’t know. He and I don’t seem to get on.  I wonder why.  Could it be my unwillingness to bend and accept that this is justice?  Could it be he’s a sexist douche-bag who has an inferiority complex about tall women?  Hell yeah I wore my 3 inch stiletto boots to court today.  FUCK SHORT MEN in positions of authority.  Talk about bullies.

On our way out from court Green tenderly held my hand.   I pull away but he holds tight.  On the road he stops to buy a coffee and a doughnut because I said I felt sick.   Yeah, getting humiliated in court will do that to you.  I said I hated him.  He said he knew that I hated him and that he was sorry. Green says he will forever regret doing what he did.  He asks me if he let me punch him in the face would that make me feel better?  He says he won’t call the police this time.   I laughed and said, Yes, yes it would.   I did NOT punch him although I wanted to.  Maybe those anger management classes are working after-all?

happy dance

This is me doing a happy dance of revenge & validation!

 Good news? Yes I got some of that too.

So just twelve hours before my court visit I spent the evening prior at a city council meeting waiting to see if they would approve a contract for a company and public policy that I had been contracted to promote and get passed.  Those city council chambers are just about 100 feet away from the courthouse that I loathe.  Well last night that city council PASSED my proposal!  Unanimously!  I had organized 20 community leaders to be with me in the audience to support the proposal and the company in case we faced opposition.  None appeared.  It passed quietly and quickly.  I know my client was thrilled.  I was shaking.  It’s the biggest deal I have ever closed.   I have been working on this deal for 6 months! Whoo-hoo! Yes!  Suck it haters! Yeah, I still got it! I f’g rule!

Suck it Judge Slick Backed Hair!  Suck it DDA Red Head and Mustache Bailiff!  Despite my anger and humiliation…. today in court I thought to myself, eff you Judge Jerk Face.  Your fancy court house is getting closed due to budget cuts.  Hah.  I hope I never see you again. In fact  I hope you ALL get laid off!  But guess what Judge Jerk?! I just got a HUGE contract from the very same city that closed down your fancy court house!! Insert maniacal laugh here.  Bwa-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

So you win some and you lose some.

Today I took a hit but I remember that at the very core I am still here. I keep going. I keep working. I keep delivering on what I promised to do. Money doesn’t make me feel better but it makes me feel safer.   Green can hurt me but even he can’t stop me.  No one can. 


32 Responses to “Punching Bags & Paychecks”

  1. DawnRaeMiller May 7, 2013 at 5:25 pm #

    You know I’m a red head, right 😉

    You go on with your ass-kicking self!

    • Flaca May 7, 2013 at 8:48 pm #

      I’m sorry! Lol!! I knew someone out there was a red head. Once again I adore you red heads…. But this guy is such a jerk! He’s a nasty man.

  2. Qgirl May 7, 2013 at 5:52 pm #

    I LOVE this post! Congrats on your success! Living well is the very best revenge. I slapped my husband too, nothing I’m particularly proud of but less than he deserved. He did nothing at the time but got kind of uppity about it later. I asked why it upset him so much. I asked if his face still hurt three months later. He said no, but it was the humiliation of it, it was the fact that I could be so uncaring to actually strike him, and it made him feel disrespected. Ha! I said you have been “slapping” me for two years, every day, only you were too much of a pussy to do it to my face, so you snuck around like a little effing weasel. AND the day I found out, I got all 730 slaps at once. That shut him the hell up. I’m sorry you have to see our misogynistic court system up close and personal. I’m thankful my whore didn’t call the cops on me.

    • Flaca May 7, 2013 at 8:54 pm #

      Yeah that’s what I said. He cheats on me and he couldn’t take a slap?! Yeah it was a bad bad time for us. It’s not a story I’m proud of but it’s part of my story nonetheless. I also knew that its kind of entertaining and would make for a lively post. Somehow I have to spin it into a positive or I’ll go nuts. And in an f’d up way its kind of funny to me now. Sometimes. 😉

  3. Still Loving Him May 7, 2013 at 7:15 pm #

    Good for you and fuck Green. I don’t think I could be with my husband if he had me arrested. I’ve attacked him physically a few times after D-day (all fucking 3 of them) and he deserved it every time, no he deserved more. He took it every time. I fucking hate men. If I do end up divorced after all this shit I’m staying single. Fuck men, fuck them all. Fucking bastards.

    • Qgirl May 7, 2013 at 8:11 pm #

      Well said, SLH!! I’m with you.

    • Flaca May 7, 2013 at 9:23 pm #

      Lol! SLH you’re awesome. Yeah this was one of the lowest things Green did. I know he’s ashamed. And he should be.

  4. bensbitterblog May 7, 2013 at 9:16 pm #

    Don’t mess with you, Green. I love the picture of you in boxing gloves.

  5. momof6boys May 8, 2013 at 7:30 am #

    I LOVED this post…you are a strong, amazing woman!! You rock!! 🙂

    • Flaca May 8, 2013 at 9:33 am #

      Thanks. It made me happy to know that this episode, my husbands infidelity, in my life does not define me. It meant a lot to know that I will be ok in spite of it and that people like my husband and his whore can’t destroy me.

  6. S May 8, 2013 at 9:39 am #

    how… just HOW did you find it in you to want to reconcile? I mean, I am not advocating violence or anything, but still. How about you file a claim against him in criminal court or at the very least a tort action because he gave you a potentially life-threatening STD? He knew the risks of STDs when he chose to have unprotected sex. He knew there was the chance of transferring that kind of disease to you when he chose to expose you to his diseased genitals after he cheated. It was definitely reasonably foreseeable that his actions could put you in danger. There´s arguably a heightened duty of care given that you are his spouse. I say this a bit tongue in cheek, but seriously. Mad props on being able to stomach him being in your life after such a low blow. As if the cheating wasn´t enough!

    • Flaca May 8, 2013 at 11:22 am #

      hah, i like your legal analysis! given that green is an attorney and that i have my own legal training we have discussed this. he has even told me other avenues in which i could have sued him. lol. it’s nuts. getting put in jail really hurt our reconciliation. it was just another way for him to hurt me. it also demonstrated to me though just how screwed up my husband was. i wont say it was GOOD for us but it does reveal a lot about where we were at.

      honestly sometimes i don’t know how i have ‘sucked it up’ and put up with the shit storm that this affair has dumped onto my life. i want this blog to be honest. so i will tell the good with the bad. i am not going to lie to myself and say “he didn’t love her, oh the sex was bad… she was just a hole… blah blah blah.” nope. i KNOW he loved her. i KNOW he liked the sex. i know it wasn’t just sex. i don’t think its helpful to lie to myself about it. i am just putting it out there, processing it and letting it go. and if someone finds it entertaining… sure why not? its like my own reality tv show.

      what i do know is that I AM hugely co-dependent and am very attracted to people who are broken and will hurt me. i LOVE broken people. i have to work on that. i cannot allow people to hurt me because of my own need to be validated by fixing them. green was and is very broken. his affair demonstrated a large amount of self hate and self destruction. he wanted to hurt me because he was very hurt himself. he is working on that. and i have to let him do that. not for just our marriage but for himself. i want him to be healthy so he can be a good dad to our kids.

      i do love my husband. i never stopped loving him. its changed and its not the same love but i still love him. i never really seriously have considered divorce as an option either. some might call it weak. i would disagree. staying and reconciling your marriage after an affair IS NOT for the weak because the easier path is divorce. i just know in my gut that would be the path that i did not want to take. i cant control Green. if he wants a divorce he can do it. i know some might call me a doormat. i hardly think that i am. i consider myself a VERY GOOD person, who is strong in maintaining my marriage and helping my spouse get better. and i am taking the opportunity to work on myself too.

      i have mentioned that to me his actions were like those of an addict. addicts do very bad things to people they care about. in this way i have come to see that Green is very broken, damaged and perhaps even ill. i wouldn’t give up on my spouse if he got sick. so i wont give up on him just because he does bad things because of this ‘illness.’ yeah, its nuts. i know green is remorseful. he says so and he demonstrates it. is he perfect and reformed? NO. but we’re getting there and that’s better than where we have been. will there be another chance? NO. i will not sign up for serial of infidelity. he has this opportunity to heal and be the best husband to me. the one i deserve. that’s it. if he does it again then we are done.

      thanks for your comment, i appreciate it… sorry for the long response!!

      • S May 8, 2013 at 11:44 am #

        Flaca, you are absolutely NOT weak or a doormat!!!!! I hope nobody ever tries to say you are weak for staying!! If they do they are idiots. Leaving is hard, as I know from experience, but staying is harder (which is why I left). I ask this with a sense of awe, not judgment — how were you able to get past “the knowing” that what he had with her, addiction or not, was not a lie while it lasted? For me, I’ll freely admit that I couldn’t do it. It was ego, self preservation, and knowing that I couldn’t live with anything other than knowing beyond a doubt that he loved me more that ultimately made me leave. No matter what promises he gave me, I didn’t see the love and I didn’t feel the love and I just couldn’t do it. I don’t think I was weak to leave and I don’t think I was strong to leave. I think it was just more than I could handle. And I think it is incredible that you are able to work past “the knowing” (it sounds appropriately ominous in my head, lol).

      • Flaca May 8, 2013 at 12:24 pm #

        Thanks. Yes… the knowing. I have no idea. I just knew it wasn’t over. Is that nuts? It sounds nuts. You know what’s nuts… Is that Green is the one who bailed me out! He called & said he was my attorney! LOL! The sheriff made fun of him. Jerk.

        And you are right. There is NO RIGHT ANSWER on how to deal with this. Whether we stay or leave. No one choice is better or worse. In order to protect ourselves and move on we have to choose what is the path that takes care of us.

        I am not over it, yet. Sometimes I think I will never get over it. I am closer to realizing that if I cannot get over it then I should end it. It is not fair to Green to constantly be hurt about it. I cant keep this as an open wound forever. Even Green has to move on with his life. Even Green deserves to be free of this. I don’t want to stay in a marriage & use this as a tool against him, “Oh you didn’t remember to pick up the milk? Oh yeah its because you’re an unfaithful jerk!” I know women who cling to the victim identity forever. Ugh that bitter shell of a person is not what I want for myself. I don’t know, believe it or not, Green and I never stopped talking. Even when he was lying and cheating we still talked. It was odd. It is still very odd. I don’t know. People ask how we reconciled. I don’t think we ever stopped talking and so reconciliation was just always there. We’re not reconciled of course. We are in the process. But it gets better, and sometimes we have set backs, but its getting better.

        I’m glad you are at peace with your decision. I am sure you left because you KNEW that it wouldn’t work for you. Good for you. Self awareness is good for you! I need some! Thanks again for your comment, I wish you nothing but the best!

  7. S May 8, 2013 at 1:39 pm #

    Thanks for your good wishes. I think I made the right decision for me 🙂

    I just wanted to say one thing that hit me in your reply is that it comes across like you feel that you owe it to Green to heal, so that HE can move on with HIS life. I will be honest, I don’t know if we ever truly heal completely from being betrayed. Why is it not fair to GREEN if you are not over it? Both of you deserve to be free of the infidelity, but the fact of the matter is that he cheated, and his infidelity is now an indelible part of both of your lives. It is certainly not good, but it is not the end of the world either. It just is. I think it may well be that you’ll always remember. You may even have triggers (sporadically) for years and years to come. So what? Think of it as an illness that you have to deal with. Green owes you a commitment to support you “in sickness and in health” just as much as you do to him. You don’t need to get over what he did to have a good life, and you certainly don’t need to get over what he did just for him or what he needs. You don’t even need to get over it for you. I think it is about finding a new normal and a new equilibrium. It could be better than what you had before, or it could be worse, but either way, it is probably not going to be exactly like it was before. This may sound a bit silly, but I think finding out about infidelity is kind of like finding out that Santa isn’t real when you’re a kid. You are disappointed and sad, and you then go through the rest of your life knowing that Santa isn’t real. That doesn’t mean that you won’t have awesome Christmas celebrations going forward, though 🙂

    • Flaca May 8, 2013 at 2:49 pm #

      good eye! yes… that would be my co-dependent ‘i-want-to-fix-everything’ nature. i am working on it! 😉

      you’re right, i won’t ever get totally over it. i know there is no such thing as ‘forgive and forget’ but i do want to move beyond it. i don’t want to be the victim anymore.

  8. S May 8, 2013 at 1:54 pm #

    PS: Also, regarding the bringing up of infidelity in arguments thing. I have to admit I was very guilty of doing this before I left the relationship. I also thought similarly to you, that if I could not get over it then I should leave, because somehow it was not fair to him. Then I realized that wait a minute! I was not bringing up the infidelity because I wanted him to lose the argument or because I wanted to be a bitch. I kept bringing up the infidelity because (1) it was almost always on my mind: and (2) the seemingly little things he did were triggering me and I was hurting and I needed to express that hurt to him.

    A lot of previously cheating spouses and betrayed spouses say that such behavior is a sure-fire way to stall recovery. I see their point. My perspective is a bit different though. For me, holding everything in stalled recovery. Expressing it… well, it made things more volatile, but it also showed me just how willing (or not, as it turned out) he was to actually try and understand me and how much he had hurt me. I didn’t do it purposely or to test him, but it ultimately did give me a chance to see whether or not he was ready to help me heal and help us heal together.

    As you forge ahead on the path that is right for you, please don’t lost sight of yourself. That is the only thing I can say that might be useful from my own experience. Don’t do anything just because you feel like you have to FOR HIM. It is not to punish him. It is just that as you recover together, you have to make sure you’re operating on a full enough tank (so to speak) so that you have enough within you to help others, including Green. Don’t be afraid of putting yourself first. It is not selfish. It is necessary.

    • Flaca May 8, 2013 at 2:52 pm #

      yes i agree. i still make my comments. and when i dont i still tell him, i should get credit for NOT making them. he knows, as i have told him, triggers are everywhere and i cannot make the process of healing faster to make him less uncomfortable. he gets it but he has moments when he gets frustrated. it makes me mad but as i tell green – you had your time to be bad. i need my time to get better. and slowly but surely i’m getting there. thanks for the pep talk! i do need to remember to put myself first after putting myself last for so long!

  9. TLM May 8, 2013 at 2:17 pm #

    That picture of Bad-Ass-Chick-in-Boxing-Gloves! has me singing Christina Aguilera’s Fighter. 🙂

    • Flaca May 8, 2013 at 2:53 pm #

      woot! that will be todays post!

  10. Jolene May 9, 2013 at 8:57 am #

    I confided to my medical doctor that sometimes I am mean to my cheating husband. He said you should be, he deserves it… My cheater has not had me arrested, that green did have you arrested pissed me off.. That is so not right, you were defending your self against him and the crimes he committed against you. Because of all the whores and cheating bastards the laws have been let go, morality is getting lost and there is no way for the victims to get justice for crimes against them… Your told give up everything you’ve worked for, walk away with your self worth… WTF!!!! Once victimized your SOL no winning..

    The whores cry out, it’s not my fault he made the vow, collect what’s left of your self worth and leave him, and leave him with all your hard work, so we the whores can take over where you left off. The whores either can’t understand or are baffled to see that the wife is not fooled into buying into the leave him, and all you’ve worked at, for this bullshit the modern area calls self worth. (Leaving = self worth) bullshit…

    Infidelity is great as I am and have been watching others. One of my friends (whom I got close to after she experienced D day) encounter D-day four months before me. When she found out, she lost control of her anger immediately to the point of rage, (don’t blame her) she kicked him out, he ran right to the other woman. Self-worth, she was so broken, she started drinking sleeping with men that have used her up and spit her out, her fire is burning out of control and no man at this point is brave enough to put it out. I watch as she is used. Self worth???? she left and she has none. The other woman is aware she’s burning out of control and uses it against her, even has manipulated one of her children against her. My friend was a wonderful woman, right now she’s not, and it is because they committed a crime against her. And she was not prepared and did not have the support she needed right away to calm down and rationale her next move. She however, did provide that for me unknowingly. She has now lost her home, in which the other woman just moved into with her children, she lives a lessor quality of life, and has no self worth as of now… I pray she gets through this as she is really a wonderful person.

    I know now that what attracted me to her was that deep down I knew infidelity had also touch my marriage and I needed her, It was weird as when I learn what was happening to her, it rock me to the core of my soul. She is a cute little blonde age 38, her husband cheated on her with a well known unstable married woman age 46, and over 200 lbs. WTF!!!

    I have been asked why I don’t leave my husband, as he broke our commitment our vows. Why I am willing to try to forgive him and refer to “My other woman” as whore.. Why I don’t walk away and leave what I worked for with my self esteem?

    1.) Commitment/ committed love is a type of love that is forever to remain with one another.
    2.) Passion and Lust are similar lust is more powerful, lust wears off quicker than passion, and once it fades nothing is there without committed love. Passion/ lust can be rekindled in a marriage, but not an affair. When its gone its gone.
    3.) When the vows were made, the vows we took involved a lot more than just being faithful. So, why is she a whore and he’s still my husband? Because I married him and made vows to him, yes he broke them, but I made vows that I really meant… I made no vows to some dumb whore and I owe her nothing. Not going let her trick me into thinking that I leave her with everything, and yet have my self worth.

    When I married my husband I had a whole heart, and own identity. I made a vow and it naturally happens over time, the two shall become one… Bingo… I can not deny him forgiveness, and torture him, and take things always from him without doing the same to my self. The two really do become one, when one hurt his wife he is only hurting himself, and when the wife hurts him in retaliation she only hurts herself. The bigger the hurt the worst it is to self.. on and on, some things are now unavoidable, but others can be stopped, and it does not have to go all the way with this so called prize of self worth by punishing him by leaving. This hurt will heal in time, if one can keep things in perspective.

    I am so hurt my husband cheated on me, and he was a cold stupid bastard. Bottom line, I have to be the bigger person, in order to keep my self worth.. And that don’t mean I haven’t beat the shit out of him more than once, he was just at a point he knew he deserved it and took it, and this time he had to be the bigger person. Green just wasn’t there yet, as much as it adds insult to injury. I am sure he now realize what a piece of shit he was to put the mother of his children in jail, for what he brought on himself, he is not a victim… Does this make any sense, I know what I am saying just how to get across the big picture?

    • Flaca May 9, 2013 at 11:52 am #

      i totally understand. and like you said, looking back, people say “how could you take him back?! he put you in jail!!” i know its sounds crazy. it was crazy. the whole things is at that time, green WAS crazy. and so was i. i guess i need to finish telling the rest of the story… it actually gets WORSE before it gets better. LOL. how it could get WORSE you say?! 😉 i will finish the rest, its just very upsetting to me, and right now i’m trying to move forward and not focus on looking back.

      i like you believe(d) in my vows. i still see in green a sickness. i am committed to healing us both. i wont commit to his continued abuse of me. that has to stop. but he has shown me remorse, in his way, and he is doing things to change. i too aim to see the big picture. this isn’t about him. or me. its about our marriage and my kids. i believe in marriage we are ONE. he was the one who cheated. not me. not US.

      i know lots of people will not agree. that’s fine. they are not in my marriage. i am not in theirs. this whole affair has taught me not to judge. i can only do what i can do to recover. it doesn’t work for everyone but its working for me. i wish you the same. its ok to show our rage i think. its ok to show our hurt. our cheating spouses need to man up and accept it. they did this to us. but we also have to heal though. eventually. at least in my case, its not helping me to constant berate and verbally abuse him. sometimes i slip. mostly i just have become quiet. he know’s that i am upset. perhaps my silence hurts him more, i don’t know.

      i do know that i don’t want to become the ‘controlling’ or the ‘angry’ person that he painted me to be. that person he created is the person he used to legitimize his affair. i cannot and will not let his affair CHANGE me. i used to be trusting, kind, compassionate and giving. i want to be that person again. i know that bad things happen to good people. i will not this bad thing change me.

    • betrayalsurvivor1981 May 22, 2013 at 3:22 pm #

      You hit the nail on the head, Jolene and Flaca! The reason why the average OW doesn’t get angry at the WH (after DDay) when he remains at home—but she gets angry at the BW instead—is b/c the other woman feels that if the wife would just kick the cheating husband out, she can “come to his rescue and heal his wounds”—and keep him for herself (which has been her goal all along)! This is true even when the WH has made it crystal clear to the OW that he TRULY does NOT want to lose his wife and marriage, and he insists that there will be NO further contact between him and the OW. The OW then tries to make the BW believe that she has no self-worth if she doesn’t divorce her WH. That’s ironic, in that the OW was willing to accept the wife’s “sloppy seconds” and be the “hidden woman” while the WH was bedding her—and STILL making love to his wife—with NO intention of leaving home, despite the lies he told the OW to the contrary—lies designed to keep the OW willing to continue spreading her legs for him)! Where’s the self-worth in being someone’s “side pussy”?

      Every BW (or BH, if the man was betrayed) has to assess whether the WH (or WW) is worth the years of the grueling work necessary to rebuild the marriage. In the 97% of cases when the cheating spouse is begging to be forgiven, the final decision rests with the betrayed spouse. Of course, in the 3% category when the WH/WW has made up his/her mind to leave the marriage, the betrayed spouse is robbed of making that decision. Either way, the decision is NEVER the OW’s to make!

      My xH was among the 3%. I KNOW how difficult divorce is—especially if it’s coupled with abandonment, b/c I felt like I’d been thrown away like garbage. That said, however, I have the UTMOST respect for BSs who choose to fight and rebuild their marriages with WSs who are genuinely remorseful and willing to do the work.

      It’s tough to divorce, but it’s toughER to stay and work with the person who plunged a knife into the BS’s back by having an affair!


      • jolene May 22, 2013 at 6:42 pm #

        Thank you. Very well said…

      • Flaca May 23, 2013 at 1:50 pm #

        i always love it when you comment, 1981! you are the best cheerleader & full of wisdom! i hope all is well!


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Chicken Daily

just a chick in her daily life

Happily. Ever? ..After

Rising above all the bullshit after my husbands infidelity

Life. Post. Affair.

Life and marriage after my husband's affair

He Never Said He Loved Her

A great WordPress.com site

Fighterandsurvivor's Blog

Just another WordPress.com site

Tearing at the Fabric

Of the space-time continuum

Will you hold my hand

married sex addict in recovery

try not to cry on my rainbow

Married to a sex addict. Rebuilding a relationship. The recovery journey.

Renewing a Right Spirit

DJ's Journey to Living Well Again


Exploring Marriage Post-Adultery

Shattered By My Husband's Affair

Picking Up The Pieces, One Shard at a Time

betrayedin2012's Blog

Ten years is the new Forever

4 little Fergusons

Faith, Family, Food, Photos & Fun

Leadership Freak

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Marriage Gems

Research-based marriage tips and insights

Karma's Payment Plan

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That Was Then

Live Relaxed

Found This Painted That

Decorating Solutions for the Dollar Challenged

Lifewithoutinstructions's Blog

living well despite a lack of written instructions


celebrating change

Leave it on the page

A blog about everything

yes this really did happen

affairs, betrayal, divorce, adultery, letter to other woman, letter to adulteress

move beyond the affair

Hope for Healing and Happiness

I Love You But I Am Not In Love With You

Trying to Make Sense of the Divorce

Being a Beautiful Mess

Dealing with the mess of life, love, betrayal, divorce, and dating

The Girl Next Door

The cynic who still wants the fairytale? This aint gonna have a happy ending.


Sex, Love & Relationships in Australia


life in all its messy, unedited, brutally honest reality...


...nouthetic, Christian care after an affair.

unloving you

it's time

Our Journey After His Affair

the reality of it all

If there is any magic in this world...

The world can be amazing when you are slightly … strange!

Quotes from an Emotional Cheater

Remembering it all, one bullsh*t line at a time

Inspirational Quotes | Motivational Blog | Images | Pictures

Quotes For Kids | Success Quotes | Bob Marley Quotes

Affair Survival Guide

For those thinking about, having, trying to end, or suffering withdrawal from an affair

Bored Nicole

An uninspired housewife's quest for something...more.

Funny Thing Happened on the Way Here

We really are our own worst enemy


Every day is a new day!


I still love her, that's enough for me

Comfortably Numb

Two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl

A blogger in turmoil

How do you get over an affair?!

Mind Blown's Blog

Affair Recovery - Journey to Staying Married


Just another WordPress.com site

Is this really my marriage?

A way to express myself about the ups and downs of trying to heal my marriage after my husband's affair.

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