So this post is being reblogged all over the the betrayed/wayward spouse blogs today. It is very good but it leaves me wanting more. As much as I admire its cautionary intent I am frankly left a bit deflated by it.
I guess, to me as betrayed spouse, and as I’ve shared with WaywardSpouse, that perhaps its a ‘day late and a dollar short’ in most cases. Do cheaters think they will cheat? I mean no one wants to be a low down lying cheater do they?! Everyone knows cheating is WRONG.
In our case if I had given this to Green I doubt it would have stopped him at all. He probably would have laughed at me. He was crazy while he was in his affair. I don’t know what drug or alcohol addiction looks like but to me this experience was as close as it gets. He was lying, deceptive, selfish and conniving. I remember when I kept asking him if he was cheating and he was denying it that I shared ALL of these outcomes with him. I asked our closest friends to intercede and Green lied to them too.
Green sneered, inches from my face, “I am not cheating on you – you’re crazy. But if I was nothing or no one would stop me or change my mind. No one can tell me what do anymore. I want to live my life and I want to be happy.”
Well well well…so now that he claims to be remorseful we are experiencing all of these outcomes. Loss of friends, respect, professional and financial setbacks, a std that I have to deal with, basically everything this list says will happen did happen.
So while I don’t relish this ‘I-told-you-so-moment’ I really wonder instead… So now what?
Originally posted on AFFAIRCARE: